I finished a book recently that I really enjoyed. It’s called John 3:16 and is written by Nancy Moser.
One of the subplots features a couple who can’t get pregnant and during all their infertility woes they find out the husband’s mother has cancer.
I won’t tell their whole story, but I will spoil part of the ending. At the end, the mom calls the whole family over with some news that she wanted to share with everyone at once. The wife, whose perspective we read throughout the book, braces herself to find out the chemo didn’t work and how long the mom had to live. I braced myself for the same thing.
When they got there the mom made her announcement. She was cancer free. The doctors were shocked. It was a miracle.
I was excited because I had really become invested in the characters’ lives, but then I was confused. I was confused because I didn’t know why I was bracing myself to find out she was about to die. They hosted prayer meetings and it was clear that the mother was a woman of faith, but I didn’t believe she was going to be healed. It was never even a thought that she might live.
In my real life, I struggle to believe that God is really Jehovah Rapha, the God who heals. When I find out someone is sick, instead of proclaiming Isaiah 53:5 “But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.” I start saying things like “Lord if it’s your will…” Or “Holy Spirit be a comforter. Help me to prepare for what’s coming.”
Science is really cool because of all the amazing things they’re able to make and fix. But I realize that it limits my ability to be a person of faith. Because I put total trust in doctors, medicines and treatments to make others feel better and I’m comfortable bragging about my mustard seed faith in God to be a healer.
This isn’t to discredit doctors, science or medicine because I totally respect the field. However, the book showed me how easily I’ll believe in the understandable things before my God.
I gotta do better because before there were scientific advances, there was the Word. From now on, I will expect miracles before I brace myself for death.
Photo cred: novelreviews.blogspot.com/2008/11/nancy-mosers-john-316-reviewed.html?m=1
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Claricha Explains It All 
I loved the transparency and honesty that you presented in this blog. I think this is an area we all struggle in and may be a bit ashamed to admit. However, it allows us to reposition ourselves, repent, and launch forward in believing God for who He is, the Healer. As you stated in the conclusion, you are going to start looking for the miracle rather than automatically bracing yourself, this encouraged and reminded me to expect the miracle as well. Thank you for taking the time to share!
Great post! I came to read something else that you posted about on Instagram, but decided to stop and read this post. So glad I did. I really needed to read that at this moment. Thanks! I love reading your blog. Keepnupbyhe great work!
Thanks for reading!