Free People, Free People


The other morning, I woke up with some special people on my mind. Those people are people like me who never fit into gender stereotypes and have felt less womanly or manly because of it. So, like most millennials I took to Facebook to express.

It was a stream of thoughts. I’m gonna post them here the same way I posted them on my profile.

If your kid cries a lot, try saying “use your words” instead of “stop crying.”
1. It’s ok to express emotions.
2. Tell them what you want instead of what you don’t want.

Your son has tear ducts. He’s supposed to cry sometimes. That doesn’t make him like a girl because he does it.

Let’s agree to stop using “like a girl” as an insult to little boys who we want to grow up and respect girls and women.

Playing with dolls and enjoying hanging with girls doesn’t make a boy gay. Stop listening to your emotionally inept family members.

If doll play is so damaging, girls shouldn’t play with them either. A four year old girl doesn’t “need” to practice mothering either.

Let’s raise children who don’t have to heal from their childhoods.

Respect =/= fear.
Take that out of your parenting tool belt.

The things that damaged you as a kid will probably be harmful to your children. Break the cycle.

Learn your child’s love language and love them how they need to be loved.

You can prepare your son for the harsh realities of the world without crushing his spirit. In fact, you should.

Let that boy play with dolls. You might have a playwright in your womb if you don’t extinguish the gift.

Let your daughter play basketball if she wants. I know it sucks, but odds are she wouldn’t grow up to be a princess anyway.

This morning’s messages come to you from a woman who hates dresses and who hated dolls and who has spent literal decades (20 of my 28 years) trying to figure out how to perform “girl.” Ever since a girl told me that girls don’t play the drums when I taught myself. Her words coupled with the stares I received until I started again at 25 (thank God for my time spent at Shekinah) crippled me.

Your words have power and they shape your children’s lives.
Your silence is also meaningful.

I woke up feeling liberated this morning so I thought I’d pass that on.
Free people free people.

“This is a true confession of a life learned lesson I was sent here to share with y’all.” India.Arie

Can I Pray For You?


I know this is posting to my social media pages, but I’m taking a break from Facebook and Twitter. However, I feel led to extend this offer. So if you see this and the answer is yes, either click the link and comment on the actual blog or send me an email at 

Feel free to share it with anyone you think would want prayer. 


In Case You Didn’t Know…


**Snagged from my 2010 tumblr blog. So excuse the stuff that’s reflective of the time it was originally posted**

I heard a song once that says, “Did you realize that you’re alive at the greatest time in history?” If you’re like me when you first read that statement you may be like, “How could you even think that’s true? Crime rates are steadily rising. Global warming is becoming a more pressing issue. Earthquakes are happening everywhere, more often than ever before…” ya know, the whole rant we can go on about the horrible state of our world. BUT the song was really talking about at this point in history, we can spread the Gospel of Jesus Christ faster than ever before!
Think about it, people in my age range tend to be members of several social networks. I am connected to thousands of people on Facebook alone. I have over 900 followers on Twitter and my followers have followers who I’ve never met before. So if I post a statement as simple as Jesus is Lord, as soon as I press the post button, INSTANTLY I have given over 1000 people the opportunity to find out more about our Lord. The same thing is true about Twitter. It’s the latest craze, but what separates Twitter from other networks is the ease at which we can repost small pieces of information. With that being said, it’s just as simple for me to tell my followers a little bit about Jesus and it could be retweeted a largely finite number of times.
All of this is nice, but you can run into people who get offended or annoyed by your social network ministry, but just as you would in face to face ministry, you have to ignore their feelings enough to help them to get saved.
After I first got saved, I had a real fire and zeal for God. I talked about Him everywhere I went and to everyone I knew, starting with my Facebook status. A girl came up to me that I knew from high school and said, “I read your statuses every day for encouragement. I read them and think ‘I wanna love Jesus like that too.’” That has stuck with me ever since that day in the Fall of 2006. If people don’t mind spreading the news of how crappy their days have been or how the people in their lives have let them down countless times, I should surely feel free to spread my love for Jesus in hopes that another person will develop a hunger and thirst for a relationship with the creator as well.
You might not have realized it was that easy.