It Was Never Just About You

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I had a conversation recently and while we were talking, I immediately felt more peace. Because in that moment, I heard the Holy Spirit whisper to me “It was never just about you.”

That was an insanely profound moment for me. One of my repeated prayers has been to just understand the purpose for some of the things I have dealt with. I’ve let the scripture replay in my mind that “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” But I lived in a constant place of wondering “Where is the good?”

Then suddenly, after a decade of asking, I received and experienced the purpose. In that moment, a life of pain and 10 years of prayers made sense for me. It all made sense when I understood that the situations were never about me.

I can’t get my time back and I actually don’t want it. I have my peace and I have made a difference.

One Day…

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Look at the chest

Make sure it’s still moving. 

Up and down it goes 

Sometimes the breathing is fast

Sometimes it slows 

You watch with hope,

But in the back of your mind is the nagging of the inevitable.

One day…

It’s gonna stop.

This life that once brought you joy 

Will soon cease to exist 

All that will be left is that dull pain in your chest 

That used to be filled with their presence, but you’re left behind to remember their essence

“It’s not so bad,” they say. 

The hole will be filled and

You’ll feel whole again… 

One day.